Drowning


In my dream
swollen waves
surge upon the sand,
mount craggy cliffs,
swamp the earth.

Today I look
upon a mirror of
still water.
Beneath the surface
roil sleeping monsters.

Submitted to dVerse Poets’ Pub for Open Link Night. The poem is also a response to Friday’s Poetics…I was late linking up. Thanks to Sheila Moore for the prompt on Water.  http://dVersePoets.com

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26 thoughts on “Drowning

  1. dani says:

    a great metaphor for many things in life. we have a tendency to “forget” the dangers once everything appears calm again. i love your words and the images they conjure!

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  2. I am fascinated by the ocean, there is an air of mystery surrounding the seas, your poem captures it. Thank you for your kind comment on my poem

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  3. Is that like the best waves photo ever!? Want to dive in, but…

    I think I’ll stay here on dry land away from those monsters,preferably neath a shady palm with margarita in hand.

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  4. Claudia says:

    gasp…you capture this so good…when everything seems to be still and quiet but somehow we know it’s not…and each moment the monsters could appear…gave me shivers victoria..

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  5. Beth Winter says:

    The title gave me a fright, then the gentle yet overpowering imagery of the write enforced it. Strong brevity, Excellent.

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  6. Patricia says:

    I read those still waters as tears ebbing for a bit until they break dam again… beautifully written about sadness… something we all can relate to.

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  7. ayala says:

    Beautiful and moving!

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  8. hedgewitch says:

    Appearance versus reality–a theme that can never be exhausted. Sometimes we put the monsters there. sometimes they surprise us all on their own.

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  9. bkmackenzie says:

    monsters sleeping…always waiting to be distrubed…listening for our footsteps ….bkm

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  10. The Great Gatsby… I’m honoured. Thanks for visiting and the lovely comment. 🙂

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  11. mish says:

    Beautiful contrasting images in your poem which captures both the destructive and the healing powers of water ! Even when the water is calm , there is still a sense of something brewing/lurking just beneath the surface …

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  12. Beautiful & evocative…a great take on the water prompt 🙂

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  13. David says:

    Victoria, I absolutely love how you’ve depicted the monsters of your dreams roiling beneath the placid waters of your waking hours. A richly textured and deeply affecting metaphor!

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  14. Ravenblack says:

    Love the contrast and the truth of it. Water is an element that can be calm and peaceful, or a monster that overcomes everything in its way. Nicely chosen images and words in this poem. 🙂

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  15. Just beautiful, Victoria. But what else would I expect.

    Namaste,
    izzy xoxox

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  16. This was a great take on the “water” prompt. Also, it reminds us that still water does indeed run deep. Those sleeping monsters, a very real concept in my world, and a devil of a time avoiding them, especially as a child. Great poetry, Victoria! Amy
    A giggle: http://sharplittlepencil.wordpress.com/2011/08/02/outstanding-what-sun-scribblings/

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  17. Whether attacks come in the form of the overwhelming outward waves that submerge or the ones that are hidden, they still come. Together they are part of our life experience. Nice poem Victoria!

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  18. Powerful, water crashing against rocks always has much power, energy … and your decription in prose was lovely.

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  19. Sheila Moore says:

    how sweet are you to include this as part of the prompt for this past Saturday 🙂 This poem is packed with awesomeness including:
    mount craggy cliffs, (loving the word, “craggy”)
    and
    roil sleeping monsters (um, yah! ever seen Jaws?)

    Thanks, Victoria!

    Like

  20. brian says:

    that is rather scary that the monsters await beneath the stillness…though many times it is the case…might want to let someone else jump in first…smiles.

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  21. Heaven says:

    great lines here:

    “upon a mirror of
    still water.
    Beneath the surface
    roil sleeping monsters.”

    Like

  22. Bodhirose says:

    Sleeping monsters under the surface–the thought scares me. But I love this, Victoria.

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  23. jgavinallan says:

    Victoria…yes…disturbing…it sneaks up on you
    Jaye

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  24. That’s really good, not to mention — disturbing. 🙂

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  25. Poetry isn’t my genre, but I know when words move me. Your words moved me.

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