Alone–dVerse Form For All

Egret Portrait

Image by ImageMD via Flickr

Lady Nyo invites us to imbibe in a Japanese form, Man’yoshu, over at dVerse Poets’ Pub. Read her inspiring and informative article and indulge yourself in reading and writing about love and longing.


Alone, on the shore
an egret waits for her mate
last seen in the spring.
Clouds roll into the valley,
bathe her in shadow.
Perhaps he will follow soon.
Perhaps you, too, will come home.

I can’t resist adding a process note on this one. I’m alone in Palm Desert for a couple of weeks for a writing retreat. For two days, on the large pond (read, water hazard) outside, I’ve noticed a lone egret. Last year there was a pair, along with their babies. This was, of course, the inspiration for the poem. I went outside to take a photo of her and as I was focusing, in flew her mate and they took off! I was afraid that he had fallen prey to the coyotes that still, from time-to-time, roam the golf course.

Sorry I missed posting a Wordsmith Wednesday this week. It took a couple of days to drive down and reestablish Internet service. Have a wonderful time at the pub!


33 thoughts on “Alone–dVerse Form For All

  1. ladynyo says:

    I don’t know how I missed this, but it’s a beautiful example of love and especially longing. It bridges the two forms within the Man’yoshu, Somon and Zoka…human love and longing and nature poems.

    It’s a lovely form of choka…that longer version of tanka.

    Thank you, Victoria, what a gift to read this morning.

    Lady Nyo


  2. Lydia says:

    Left another message just as my ISP dropped service, so am not sure if it went through….

    Your Man’yoshu is so beautiful that I have fallen in love with the form with this first-time read!

    Have a wonderful writing retreat in Palm Desert. I have a childhood friend who lives and practices law there, but have not seen that gorgeous area.


  3. Lydia says:

    If yours is an example of Man’yoshu, then I know I love that form. It’s beautiful, so is the image, and the back-story made for a most pleasing post.

    Have a wonderful writing retreat. Sounds beautiful! I’ve never been there. A childhood friend of mine lives and practices law in Palm Desert.


  4. Lovely words, I love egrets, I love all birds but egrets have a serene presence about them. So glad her mate returned, again lovely!


  5. With nature I always find hope…so glad this had a happy ending…such a lovely piece….may your writing retreat be blessed


  6. Mary says:

    Coming home…I hope for that too.

    Feeling nostalgic about your mention of Palm Desert. I love that part of the world and have had a writing retreat in Palm Springs a few years ago. I’d go back there again in a heartbeat.


  7. This is just beautiful! And you bring in the human factor so delicately. 🙂 It seems to me to capture the ‘flavour’ of the Man’yoshu perfectly.

    I enjoyed reading your process note and I’m glad you included it, but the poem stands alone.


  8. Morning says:

    just placed your blog link in my blog roll, along with other writing challenge.


  9. zongrik says:

    wish you could stop by and visit…i’m about three hours or so away…you’d love the poetry you could write about the desert here


  10. Laurie Kolp says:

    Aww… that’s so sweet. I’m glad they found one another. Birds always amaze me.


  11. brian miller says:

    ooo love it victoria…nice how you start in nature and then bring it personal…

    hope you have a great trip!


  12. vivid imagery, I can visulize you there, waiting.



  13. manicddaily says:

    Very lovely, Victoria. I feel like your poetry often has this beautiful descriptive/Japanese type quality.

    Thanks. K.


  14. neelthemuse says:

    The last line clinches it….tender!


  15. Ruchi Jain says:

    beautiful work…


  16. Victoria, this projection of the egret and human relationships… a nice melding of nature and “human nature.” Like Claudia, I’m happy for the bird!

    Hope you have a lovely retreat. You deserve it! Amy


  17. Mohana says:

    Beautiful…longing, love… “Perhaps you, too, will come home.” Excellent!


  18. souldipper says:

    Cold, blustery and lonely…brrrrr. So glad to learn its mate appeared. (It was the female who was late. She was elsewhere asking directions! 😀 )


  19. Ruth says:

    A lovely snapshot in words – glad you added the note that the mate came along. And the final line adds much to the poem…


  20. Shawna says:

    There is so much sadness in the perhaps, the unknowing, the empty.


  21. So you’ve been roughing it on the golf course:)
    Beautiful poem. Nature always, or most always, inspires me. I’m having to slow down a lil to see more egrets, and maybe a golf course or two. Nice reminder. Excellence in presentation. Gentle as tissue.


  22. Ravenblack says:

    The last lines bring it together wonderfully.

    And that’s a very cool capture of the egret.


  23. Heaven says:

    I like that hopeful waiting for a loved one..nice poetry form and words ~


  24. This beauty flies off the page and while it’s the story of an egret pair, I overlaid a pair of cranes for all that imagery of one culture over another. The beautiful story standing parable for a human couple and the longing of one for another. Exquisite Victoria!


  25. Such a soft and gentle feel to that poem. Nature is such an inspiration. Happy writing on your retreat!


  26. claudia says:

    i’m glad there’s a happy ending for that bird…love the clouds bathing her in shadow..and sounds like you’re having a good time…enjoy..


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