I dream of emptiness, of cinnamon,
and summer nights infused with sweet aroma,
then wait in stillness for the rain to come.
In darkness, hoping for the light to come,
the air hangs heavy, scents of cinnamon
invade my room—seductive, sweet aroma.
Before the dawn, such sensuous aroma,
an open door, desiring you should come
and taste of bliss, of love and cinnamon.
Such cinnamon. Such aromatic Come.
Over at dVerse Poet’s Pub, Sam Peralta introduces us to the Tritina–sort of a mini-Sestina–and invites us to try one of our own. Stop on over, learn about the form, write one of your own and join us at the pub for some good poetry. I’ve chosen a few of the words offered by Shawna in her word prompt at Flipside Records.
A poem about cinnamon! Perfect for the fall and perfectly charming read.
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Beautiful job!
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The chanting repetition of the images underpins the charged atmosphere of the piece. Very effective.
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I take it that you know that men are turned on by the smell of cinnamon? I thought it was the association to cinnamon buns, but I think it’s reading this poem… 😉
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What a beautiful play on a sestina…… This is absolutely musical! Bravo! Always leave your mark on everything, dear Victoria and never follow the rules! That is what defines beauty…
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from the first line I could smell (and taste) cinnamon in the air. a beautiful and inviting piece.
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Wow, this is so sensual, I was totally lost in your words. Cinnamon is one of those scents–sweet, tantalizing, earthy. You did a wonderful job with this. My favorite so far!!
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Ah.. cinnamon! I always love them, the aroma and the taste in cooking and cakes! Nicely done Victoria!
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What a wonderful poem! I’m amazed at how well you wove those words into such a great tritina. Love the sensual nature of the poem.
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The otehr commenters have said what I wanted to say, so I’ll just add “Me too!” Loved reading this sensual, engaging piece.
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Love the combination of cinnamon with anything…well done!
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very nice… like a waltz with words
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Oh the sultry of cinnamon! I love this so much. Very sensual.
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Engaging and aromatic!
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Victoria, this is wondrous, sensuous, beautiful… so amazingly flowing that I nearly forgot that this was a tritina. You did for the aroma of cinnamon what I set out to do with avocado, I can almost think of the two as companion-pieces. A poem I wish I’d written.
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Love the freedom you gave to the form.
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Love the aromas here. Cinnamon scent is one of my favorite, we always get these candles from yankee around this time and there’s one harvest something or other that has a really nice cinnamon scent to it. Great job using the form, really love how you focused on scent here, the intro with the dream was a really nice touch as well. Thanks
http://poeticalpsyche.blogspot.com/2012/08/tigers-and-gazelles.html
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ahhaaa….i can smell the warm aroma of cinnamon. Waiting for autumn!
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Oh this aroma reached me…..this is such a subtle soft poem…..
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Victoria, I am so envious of this poem. Such a treat to read, specially after my unfulfilled struggle with the form!
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cinnamon is such a sensual aroma..and it just spreads magically in your poem
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Cinnamon is my favorite EVERYTHING–and you just gave it several more dimensions!
At the same time, your word play with “come” multiplies the passion your narrator has “of summer nights” Gosh. Spicy.
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I like the aroma and taste of cinnamon words…such a lovely seductive invitation ~
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I loved the opening, particularly the scent of cinnamon and your compelling use of “emptiness.” Then I neared the ending and was so excited about this part: “desiring you should come and taste of bliss, of love and cinnamon”
I hadn’t noticed yet that there was one more line. And oh my, what a line it was! You pretty much knocked my socks off with this finale: “Such cinnamon. Such aromatic Come.” It demands the reader return to the opening line, assigning different meanings to “cinnamon.” Not only does your clever capitalization draw attention to the word “Come,” but it also makes it a proper noun—giving it spiritual emphasis, perhaps even making it a god or an idol.
“I dream of emptiness” … I think it’s brilliant the way you’ve altered the meaning here. Emptiness draws forth feelings of loss and sadness. But by the end, it is clear that the emptiness to which you refer is physical; it is a giving, a release of yourself … which you crave. Very different than my initial interpretation of the first line. Bravo! I love this.
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Thanks for your comments, flipside. Actually, I was seeking to blend both the physical and spiritual–somewhat like in the Song of Songs (Song of Solomon) which uses erotic language and images metaphorically to express spiritual longing.
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That book was my source for Monday’s word list. 🙂
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Seductive on many levels…the aroma of the cinnamon, the rain, the waiting for the lover…filled with senses and emotion, Victoria…beautifully done.
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Just beautiful. Such a ‘scentual’ poem. I love especially the first stanza, and the waiting for the rain. And now I find myself craving cinnamon.
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This form ends up being just exquisite. You have inspired me to give it a try. I might not make the deadline, but that is OK. The sent you chose, cinnamon, is very intriguing here. I will have to sniff through all my spices and see if I can come up with something for a poem someday!
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Very controlled–in the sense of tightly crafted-and very very sensual at once. K.
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mmmm love the smells you got going…and the desire for them to be there to share the moment with you as well….def fun and sensual and nicely worked to form…
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I think the last lines of these are the hardest–much harder than a sestina envoi. Yours is excellent and unexpected, thus even more engaging and sensual, and really referring back to previous images, then jumping past them. I really like what you did here, Victoria.
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Love the smell of cinnamon. This is a very sensuous, soft, romantic tone. Lovely Tritina.
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I can smell the cinnamon, feel the love.
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Like how you transformed “aroma” into “aromatic” in the last refrain. Very sensuous poem – full of fragrance, texture and longing. Well done!
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Victoria–love this–it is sweet-smelling, seductive, and fun. Awesome job on the form!
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