Photo Credit: Kate Aubrey, Google Images
last night, in a dream
i walked the shore with Bashō
wrote poetry of spring’s death
today wide awake
i breathe honeysuckle moons
waiting for summer’s sunrise
Photo Credit: Wikipedia
Join us over at dVerse Poet’s Pub where Sam invites us to sip of a Japanese poetry form: Sedoka. The form consists of two unrhymed tercets, each having 5-7-7 syllables. They express the same thought, but with a twist. It’s very fun. Thank you, Sam.
Victoria C. Slotto, Author 
Victoria, your Sedokas are lovely! Thank you for teaching me a new poetry form.
Blessings ~ Wendy
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Beautiful feel to this piece, Victoria. I haven’t tried this form yet, sometimes the simplest are the hardest for me to create. You have really done the form justice. Nicely penned, indeed!
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exquisite in form and sensitivity. this has such a natural flow, Victoria. I love it.
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loved reading it … there’s a strange sense of contrast in it … so well done!
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Perfect for the summer solstice.
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wow…so beautiful…loved the images!
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marvelous in-sight to in-flight ~ I’m blessed by your writing !
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Victoria, another lovely write by you and the pictures are beautiful..
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How beautiful!
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Lovely words to commemorate the end of spring and beginning of summer. Honeysuckle moons make the solstice even more magical.
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Gorgeous! This enraptured me!
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honeysuckle moon?!! Simply magical.
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Victoria so much beauty… not sure if I’d prefer the dream or reality… maybe a piece of each
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beautiful striking contrast!
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Using Bashō in a sedoka (I keep wanting to write sudoku.. haha) is a fantastic inspired idea. I loved the line i breathe honeysuckle moons. -Mike
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This is an absolutely beautiful sedoka, perfectly parallel verses, balanced between the dream and the real worlds, lilting and lyrical.
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Very pretty, Victoria – you’ve got a gift for this! k.
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Exquisite, Victoria. Well done!
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..to have a walk with Basho is priceless… ah, you nailed this Victoria…. smiles…
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as said above, nicely done, basho’s long walk, the turning season, the olfactory sense, the acute observations, deftly handled with economy!
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How delightfully Basho-like! Sedoka – A Summer Love Poem
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Beautiful–wide awake, fully alert, even in our dreams. That makes good poets. Expertly done, your poetry always touches a chord with me!
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oh – honeysuckle moons – such a wonderful image – really lovely poem, Victoria! K
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Beautifully done Victoria ~ I like the turn from spring’s death to honeysuckle moons & summer sunrise ~
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Victoria, this is bsolutely gorgeous – Basho and honeysuckle moons!
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I’ll return the compliment: this shows great skill. You managed to combine elements I worked on during my walk, but couldn’t fit together. ‘honeysuckle’ was one of them, as its scent is all-pervading at the minute.
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Ah yes, solstice, honeysuckle moons, and summer’s sunrise, what could more appropriate I wouldn’t know !! Well Done !!
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This Sedoka just rocks, because you touched on the oriental themes, but still infused your Western sensitivities on it; masterful job, Victoria.
Gave me peace, hope, and a lighter stride today.
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Oh, Victoria, “spring’s death,” nice!
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Love the dream with Basho and I envy your for that. Cool that we went solstice both of us. I thought it perfect for the form. And any poem with honeysuckle wins my love
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Love the contrast, peaceful feel.
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mmm warm honeysuckle…nothing like it…when steve was here we hit the honeyscukle hard…ha…spring dies so summer can be born…just make sure you wear a little block so that summer sunrise doesnt cook you…smiles….very cool progression in this victoria…
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breathing honeysuckle moons…nice…also love the idea of walking the shore with Bashō… that would be cool…poems about spring’s death now that summer’s ’round the corner…nice..
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