solstice


 

Photo Credit: Kate Aubrey, Google Images

Photo Credit: Kate Aubrey, Google Images

last night, in a dream
i walked the shore with Bashō
wrote poetry of spring’s death

 

today wide awake
i breathe honeysuckle moons
waiting for summer’s sunrise

Photo Credit: Wikipedia

Photo Credit: Wikipedia

 

Join us over at dVerse Poet’s Pub where Sam invites us to sip of a Japanese poetry form: Sedoka. The form consists of two unrhymed tercets,  each having 5-7-7 syllables. They express the same thought, but with a twist. It’s very fun. Thank you, Sam.

 

34 thoughts on “solstice

  1. Victoria, your Sedokas are lovely! Thank you for teaching me a new poetry form.

    Blessings ~ Wendy

    Like

  2. Beautiful feel to this piece, Victoria. I haven’t tried this form yet, sometimes the simplest are the hardest for me to create. You have really done the form justice. Nicely penned, indeed!

    Like

  3. janehewey says:

    exquisite in form and sensitivity. this has such a natural flow, Victoria. I love it.

    Like

  4. Baishali says:

    loved reading it … there’s a strange sense of contrast in it … so well done!

    Like

  5. Perfect for the summer solstice.

    Like

  6. sreeja says:

    wow…so beautiful…loved the images!

    Like

  7. marvelous in-sight to in-flight ~ I’m blessed by your writing !

    Like

  8. Truedessa says:

    Victoria, another lovely write by you and the pictures are beautiful..

    Like

  9. vb holmes says:

    Lovely words to commemorate the end of spring and beginning of summer. Honeysuckle moons make the solstice even more magical.

    Like

  10. Poet Laundry says:

    Gorgeous! This enraptured me!

    Like

  11. Mohana says:

    honeysuckle moon?!! Simply magical.

    Like

  12. wolfsrosebud says:

    Victoria so much beauty… not sure if I’d prefer the dream or reality… maybe a piece of each

    Like

  13. beautiful striking contrast!

    Like

  14. bostonpoetry says:

    Using Bashō in a sedoka (I keep wanting to write sudoku.. haha) is a fantastic inspired idea. I loved the line i breathe honeysuckle moons. -Mike

    Like

  15. This is an absolutely beautiful sedoka, perfectly parallel verses, balanced between the dream and the real worlds, lilting and lyrical.

    Like

  16. ManicDdaily says:

    Very pretty, Victoria – you’ve got a gift for this! k.

    Like

  17. Exquisite, Victoria. Well done!

    Like

  18. Kelvin S.M. says:

    ..to have a walk with Basho is priceless… ah, you nailed this Victoria…. smiles…

    Like

  19. Ray Sharp says:

    as said above, nicely done, basho’s long walk, the turning season, the olfactory sense, the acute observations, deftly handled with economy!

    Like

  20. nico says:

    Beautiful–wide awake, fully alert, even in our dreams. That makes good poets. Expertly done, your poetry always touches a chord with me!

    Like

  21. oh – honeysuckle moons – such a wonderful image – really lovely poem, Victoria! K

    Like

  22. Grace says:

    Beautifully done Victoria ~ I like the turn from spring’s death to honeysuckle moons & summer sunrise ~

    Like

  23. Rowan Taw says:

    Victoria, this is bsolutely gorgeous – Basho and honeysuckle moons!

    Like

  24. aprille says:

    I’ll return the compliment: this shows great skill. You managed to combine elements I worked on during my walk, but couldn’t fit together. ‘honeysuckle’ was one of them, as its scent is all-pervading at the minute.

    Like

  25. cloudfactor5 says:

    Ah yes, solstice, honeysuckle moons, and summer’s sunrise, what could more appropriate I wouldn’t know !! Well Done !!

    Like

  26. Glenn Buttkus says:

    This Sedoka just rocks, because you touched on the oriental themes, but still infused your Western sensitivities on it; masterful job, Victoria.
    Gave me peace, hope, and a lighter stride today.

    Like

  27. Marya says:

    Oh, Victoria, “spring’s death,” nice!

    Like

  28. Love the dream with Basho and I envy your for that. Cool that we went solstice both of us. I thought it perfect for the form. And any poem with honeysuckle wins my love

    Like

  29. Laurie Kolp says:

    Love the contrast, peaceful feel.

    Like

  30. brian miller says:

    mmm warm honeysuckle…nothing like it…when steve was here we hit the honeyscukle hard…ha…spring dies so summer can be born…just make sure you wear a little block so that summer sunrise doesnt cook you…smiles….very cool progression in this victoria…

    Like

  31. claudia says:

    breathing honeysuckle moons…nice…also love the idea of walking the shore with Bashō… that would be cool…poems about spring’s death now that summer’s ’round the corner…nice..

    Like

Leave a reply to wolfsrosebud Cancel reply