Photo Credit: Gabriella
All Rights Reserved
Used with permission
The Whether Channel
a Fictional Haibun
I waited none too patiently, at the curb—unsure if she would show, as promised. The steady pitter-patter of raindrops on the roof of my old Ford and the click-click-clicking of the hazard lights matched the pace of my anxiety-driven pulse. Cars puddled by, splashing my windows in their wake. The scent of rain blended with dust on the drought-thirsty street.
She exited the office building, popped open the teal umbrella I’d given her last Christmas, and surveyed her surroundings. When she caught sight of me, she took off down the block in the opposite direction. I sighed and pulled away from the curb without trying to pursue her. Then I hit my husband’s speed dial. “Our daughter isn’t ready,” I told him. “Rehab won’t help until she wants it.”
weatherman forecasts
rain, tears of disappointment
beware of flooding
Written for and linked to Gabriella’s Monday Haibun prompt at dVerse Poets. We are grateful to her for the beautiful photography she shared for us today. The pub opens at 12:00 Noon EST on Monday. The link will be open throughout the week. Please join us.
Victoria C. Slotto, Author 
A sad reality for so many as they stand by helplessly. You have captured that feeling in a realistic scenario, eloquently written.
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Truly heartbreaking situation and a flood of disappointment for parents…I know of a family going through this, it’s tearing them up.
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I liked the understated drama and mystery, the great title and inclusion of the senses. A gem.
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A sad story, grippingly told.
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Oh….this is heartbreaking. The words, the sounds, the color teal, the dialogue…the haiku. Parenting is such an emotional responsibility and as your story indicates, they are our children, no matter how old they get…and we are always concerned.
The forecast of disappointment in the haiku…is a perfect description the encapsulates the driver’s feelings here…….
very well done.
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Oh, so well done, the rain, the puddling cars, the teal umbrella…..perfection.
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So very sad. But until they are ready, nothing will take. Sometimes it never does, unfortunately. I’ve been part of a recovery community for years and it is a heartbreak for anyone who loves someone that can’t see the need for change. The whole rainy scene added to the tears of this.
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ohhh – I thought this was a lover’s story and then…so sad with the daughter, heartbreaking
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The sad resignation of the mother speaks volumes of the past. Good story.
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Clever title Victoria ~ But this is a sad situation for the parents, and for the daughter too ~ Though fiction, I can relate to the anxiety of the mother ~
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This causes me to sigh and shudder…so sad. One of the hardest things to deal with – addiction. Well done.
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Love your choice of “Whether” here, Victoria. There is so much heartbreak in this one. Well done.
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Ditto.
I’m sure far too many parents (and teens/young adults) can relate to this scenario.
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I always liked that song by Amy Winehouse but it’s not to be taken lightly when someone you love is enmeshed in drugs. Truly, they do have to want it for themselves. It won’t work otherwise. Tough on everyone involved.
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Males.. sTill often preconceived
predators.. when they are
just in man mode..
So true..
how cultures
since the Agriculture
age have made
this fiction
reality
change and
balance back
to egalitarianism
where chosen
froZen..
ones’
become
allnoW free..
coMing stronGer..
theaTer
naMed aLL
Earth..:)
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Great play-on-words, Victoria. I like how vivid the scene is and how we wonder who is waiting for whom until the end.
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The depth of feeling and the connections between the weather and our emotions is superb!
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Although you clearly state this is a fiction it is a fiction that mirrors a truth that haunts many families. There are so many tortured souls that cannot bear to face their own darkness.
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So many emotions link up, are stimulated, even intensified by the rain. this is an excellent haibun, with a clincher emotional haiku; but me in a sad place for a moment remembering others who were too much like the daughter of the piece. The documentary, AMY, on Ms. Winehouse is heartbreaking.
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I think that is true – sadly – but in a way wise..i am glad she has parents who at least care enough to still watch over her
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Oh, I can feel the mother’s heartbreak so very deeply in this one! Hope can so easily be dashed by what one sees between the droplets of a torrential rain.
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Profoundly sad.
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This is so sad.. the weather just adds to the mournful chasm between child and parents… So often rehab just gives a momentary pause… and of course my thoughts goes immediately to the life and death of Amy Winehouse
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