Panic


I began writing this for the contest celebrating dVerse’s first year anniversary, (for the urban theme)  but I wasn’t able to complete it in time, so I thought I’d link it to OLN. I’m beginning to think I’m a rural recluse at heart!

Photo: Google Images
howtogeek.com

Panic

I fear the city.
I fear gang-
ly groves of trees
that prowl,
pursuing bedlam.

I fear unknown
faces, unfamiliar voices
lurking in night-black
alleyways,
their purpose
fraught with pain,
ambition,
ill-intent.
I fear their primal rage

and I fear FEAR,
that hurtles toward
destruction
or success,
anonymity amassed
in closed-in space
that sucks stifled
stale air.

I fear the loss
of open fields,
of earth’s dank smell
and Gaia’s grainy touch.
The loss of birdsong,
and of honeysuckle scents,
of water running clear.

How I fear height,
the towering structures
pressing on my freedom.

I long for mountain tops,
escaping expectations.

Join us over at dVerse for some wonderful poetry and good friends. The pub doors open wide at 1500 EST on Tuesday.

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21 thoughts on “Panic

  1. dragonkatet says:

    Like zongrik, the enjambment of gang-ly really made me smile. You’ve captured some pretty accurate descriptions of the overall “feel” of the city heart-beat in this. There is always an undercurrent of fear, I think, in cities, especially the large ones. Then I wonder if those who prefer the city would feel the same kind of fear from being in the country-side? Perhaps it is more “fear of the unknown” than anything else? I don’t know. But I did enjoy this piece.

    Like

  2. dani says:

    i understand fearing fear….

    stunning writing, Victoria!

    Like

  3. hobgoblin2011 says:

    really interesting way to look at panic here. The city for all it’s beauty and wonder within, does have a darker, more sinister side that most definitely casts a sense of fear. When traveling from the rural to the urban, you, at least I, always find myself feeling moving from a larger place to a smaller place, completely opposite of reality, and I love the city so this poem works really well on a number of levels and across preferences of the reader as well. Very nicely done. Thanks

    Like

  4. “and I fear FEAR,
    that hurtles toward
    destruction
    or success,
    anonymity amassed
    in closed-in space
    that sucks stifled
    stale air.” wow! I too am a mountaintop kind of person.

    Like

  5. I long for mountain tops,
    escaping expectations.
    Love this end, they do seem to call somedays. Living in the country I find cities have their call as well the peace of anonymity, the beauty of architecture and hushed museums. I enjoyed your lovely words on nature’s grace.

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  6. ayala says:

    I love both the city and the country. This poem made me think of my husband, he doesn’t like the city anymore. 🙂

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  7. vivinfrance says:

    I’m sure you have it right, but this country girl likes to walk in a city occasionally. Your gang-ly groves of trees made me smile.

    Like

  8. lucychili says:

    there is much to love in the natural world

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  9. ladynimue says:

    any moment I could run frrom the city , I would not be thinking twice .. or questioning myself .. I so relate to this poem . thank you for outting it so beautifulyl here 🙂

    Like

  10. ManicDdaily says:

    Well, I DO understand! Although oddly, other than a generalized fear of terrorism, I rarely feel afraid of people in the City. There are just too many of them somehow. (If I do get afraid, it’s more likely late in my apartment than on the street.) But you describe the panic that one can get very well. k.

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  11. You fear heights and long for mountaintops. Don’t we all, or some of us, fear what we deire most. I sword fight with fears too and these words ring true to me. I’ve had to learn to coexist with fear. I loved this poem!

    Like

  12. and I fear FEAR,
    that hurtles toward
    destruction
    or success,

    I have been pondering a bit upon that lately. Inded anxiety is a presupposition for growth (success). But there is a fear which just is terrible, and that is when you don’t know, actually, what you fear, that is when your basis is uncertain. That fear is destructive. I believe you point the thing out in your last verses by saying height is no problem when standing on a mountain.

    Nice. But I am no fan of the form you use. I am a fan of regular poems.

    ▌ AWE ▐

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  13. Susan says:

    It’s a kind of claustrophobia that you describe beautifully with walls close and as panic-inducing as strangers and groups. I love how the “primal rage” that could be a threat is balanced by primal fear itself:
    “that hurtles toward
    destruction
    or success,
    anonymity amassed”
    Who could breathe???? And so, logically and brilliantly, the panic leaps to what could be lost. POWERFUL! fearing the height of buildings but not mountains.

    Like

  14. markwindham says:

    fear indeed, in many forms. I despise downtown Atlanta from many of these reasons. I would prefer life in the country, small towns, etc. But not sure my wife could handle the distance from a target. 🙂

    Like

  15. beckykilsby says:

    You really work a rhythm here… love the structure of the piece, Victoria.

    Like

  16. poemsofhateandhope says:

    Can’t tell you how much I loved the lines- ‘i fear gangly groves of trees, that prowl….’….this just conjured up such great city imagery…I was totally there….thought this was excellent

    Like

  17. I find much more to fear in the city than the country. You caught that fear well.

    Like

  18. Ruth says:

    I can identify, I’m not a big city lover myself – love especially the stanza about fearing fear…

    Like

  19. brian miller says:

    i pine for both the mountains and the city…being in the mountains, i feel the city but i imagine if i lived there…it might be here i pine for…i like natures touch…but the concrete jungle calls…smiles.

    Like

  20. zongrik says:

    i like the enjambment of the gang, really great pun there.

    then it gets sad, especially when you lose the scents.

    Like

  21. Claudia says:

    smiles…so you’re not a city person..smiles…what i loved here most was the fear of fear…isn’t it strange how this can bind and block us from taking steps into new territory..whatever it is…

    Like

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