Photo: mentalfloss.com
overcast with a strong chance of pain
before your love grew cold
before the chill of apathy
(the whimpering dying flame)
there were those days
of sizzle like moth wings
the trickster took his time
took hold of you
or was it I, eye couldn’t
wouldn’t see the color gray?
the color of a stone cold heart
Today, Mary Kling challenges us to grab a line from a poem by Naomi Shihab Nye: Burning the Old Year. This brilliant work offers many opportunities for inspiration. The dVerse doors open wide at 3:00 PM on Tuesday. The line in italics is from Nye’s poem.
My quadrille for Monday’s prompt is here. That fun prompt is open all week.
Victoria C. Slotto, Author 
You kNow.. Victoria.. the more i thiNk/FEEL
about iT.. the more it disgusts me..
that when i lost my emotions
all anyone could offer
was a pill..
and no
way
out of hell..
or even wHere
human emotions
exist at all.. perhaps
a symptom of some
in the health field
who have
wittingly
or
unwittingly
turned there’s
off too.. and perhaps
that is why it is best to
see smiling clergy or
friends than any
doctor
or other
professional
of black clothed
heARt.. after all..
science says it’S
epidemic.. with even
college age adults losing
30 percentage points of
their empathy IQ over the
last several decades.. poverty
of feeling and sharing feelings
is truly
at Zombie
Apocalypse
Grey Alert..:)
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You had me with the title. There was definitely pain in this one. Peace, Linda
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Love how you waxed eloquently on your chosen line…paired with perfect image!
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the heat of passion, the coldness as it dies…… you’ve taken us on a rollercoaster ride
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Stone cold hearts are surely devoid of vibrancy. A solid piece here, Victoria!
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I was about to comment on the I/eye…this captured me the way that it did for, De. 🙂
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And a wonderful title!
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Well said!
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Very nice, Victoria!
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The colour of a stone cold heart — wonderful.
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you used your chosen line brilliantly – a line that most would interpret in a negative way, you were able to put a positive spin on…even if to emphasize the sadness of the rest of the poem.
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We’re all captivated by your wonderful title, but the message of the poem is even stronger.
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Excellent title and the play on I/eye.
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This is very powerful, the trickster that stole the loved one away. It is good there are days that sizzles like moth wings to remember, but both our poems express that is small comfort.
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Makes me wonder what happened. Their relationship burned fast and hot at first, not taking the time to get to know each other. Then, it was over, as true personalities came to the forefront. Great poem! 🙂
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Do we miss the signs that signal that stone- cold heart or do we choose to miss them?
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This is a great title! The sizzle can turn to fizzle in very subtle ways. Before you know it, you wonder what the heck happened. Well put, Victoria.
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I really like how your line about the moth in the flame itself sheds a subdued light on the love you are describing. Complicates the relationship even more.
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I like the idea of a stone cold heart being the color of gray.
Beautifully penned 🙂
Lots of love,
Sanaa
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Beautiful !
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I like the play (in both sound, and meaning) of the I, eye combination.
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From flames to stone cold… you really nailed the line and made it yours.
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Your chosen line was one I was going to use, but forged ahead with another. You’ve packed so very much into two brief stanzas, proving that in poetry, size is irrelevant. Your transitions are bold–love lost can only be healed by fresh love found.
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Love how you used the line… and the second stanza, with the I, eye … what exquisite closing with the grey and stone-cold heart.
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I love the title and the twist of perspective here:
or was it I, eye couldn’t
wouldn’t see the color gray?
the color of a stone cold heart
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I like the way your poem transitioned….from the time that love had ‘sizzled like moth wings’ to the time it became ‘the color of a stone cold heart.’
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A great take on the prompt.. days that sizzled like moth wings..lovely!
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Excellent shift from sounds to sight 🙂
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lovely post
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