Slow Burn–dVerse Quadrille


Photo: US Marine Corps

Slow Burn
A Quadrille

In my dream,
spot-fires bleed across the foothills,
crest on the summit,
swoop into our valley,
consume, burn

I sensed a restless-
ness last night
you told me
“It’s the weather,
the threatening storm.”

In the morning,
when I awaken,
you are gone.

Today I’m hosting the Quadrille at dVerse Poets and the word I’m looking for is burn. I took an old poem that was quite short, changed it up a bit, and this is what came out of it. This is fictional.

33 thoughts on “Slow Burn–dVerse Quadrille

  1. HemasSphere says:

    Beautiful poem. Loved reading it.

    I am relatively new to blogging. Love it when I come across blogs and posts like that of yours.
    Just 3 posts old here. I am working on a series of 5 and the 4th post is on the way here.Would be glad if you could drop by my blog.


  2. Misky says:

    Well, I hadn’t expected that ending!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Love the ending on this, a total surprise.
    Thanks so much for that video, I really enjoyed it.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. whimsygizmo says:

    Oooooo. I wasn’t expecting that last stanza. Wonderful. So foreboding, this.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. merrildsmith says:

    I love this, Victoria. There’s a whole story (at least hinted) here–the restlessness, the fires burning–a sort of hint of something not right. . .Then in my mind, I wondered if he was a ghost.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I like the ending. It’s surprising, but natural at the same time after that build-up.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Sanaa Rizvi says:

    This is beautifully evocative💞 The feeling of restlessness is so palpable.. so incredibly raw and potent. I love how you tie its image to the onset of a storm.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Loved it, Victoria. It is so vivid !

    Liked by 1 person

  9. I really love how you carry the fear/dread emotion evoked by the thought of those ravenous spot fires and feed it into the story that unfolds in the rest of the poem.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. rothpoetry says:

    Dreams have that quality of living one thinking what next and wishing for more! Great job!


  11. Sabra Bowers says:

    Enjoyed your fiction poem. I like to write them, too. Exercise for the imagination, I say.


  12. Vivian Zems says:

    The first stanza is beautifully descriptive….and you’ve left me wanting more!


  13. willow88switches says:

    the weather – threatening storm – and flash fire gone – this is interesting, how there are several layers to this, makes for several ideas crackling … I like the concrete ambiguity of this, if that makes any sense


  14. I feel like I might have said this before about one of your poems but this feels like the beginning of a novel. So much backstory for the reader to imagine. Nicely written!


  15. Collecting Conscious
    Of Day Dreams ‘Fore
    Fire in Morning Light
    Dreams Winged
    Humming Birds
    Dance Sing me
    For True Victoria S.. if my right
    eye and ear had not caught FiRE
    oF HeLL BeLoW For 66 Months my left
    foot might not have come one with
    A Right
    allone iN
    HeaVeN’s BuRN
    At LEasT to me tHiS oNCE iS WoRTH
    66 WorDS WiTH FredkuFredbun FLoWeR FReED..;)

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Grace says:

    A restless night with dreams of a coming storm for me mean a great change is coming. Are we ready for it?


  17. The story behind this is…I have no idea what. So make up your own! That’s what happens to fiction writers when they go poetic. The first couple of lines, about the wildfire, is (sadly) not fictional. I live in wildfire country.


  18. Waltermarks says:

    What is the mystery of the fiery storm? You must invent one to go with the poem, even though it’s fictional. We have to have the last chapter

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Candy says:

    Ooo – this took me by surprise!

    Liked by 1 person

  20. I love where you take this and I am left wondering who it is who is gone in the morning.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. Frank Hubeny says:

    I liked how you made the transition from restlessness to being gone at the end.

    Liked by 1 person

  22. Mysterious, as if “you” are the spirit of the fiery, restless wind.

    Liked by 1 person

  23. I love the conversation in this dream… but also something like an omen. Such dreams should not be taken lightly.

    Liked by 2 people

    • kim881 says:

      I agree with Bjorn about the conversation and that omen dreams are to be heeded. I love the change in tone from the relentless burning in the first stanza to the sensible comment about the threatening storm and then the dismay of final stanza.


  24. lillian says:

    sensing a restlessness….a coming storm….and in the morning, he is gone. That feeling of uneasiness….the knowing something not-good is coming….sometimes a change in the weather can create that sense within.

    Liked by 1 person

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